"One beggar telling another beggar where to find bread" - Anon.
Imposing legalistic formulas and steps on how to do things only heaps condemnation on people’s heads. They try and attain the goals set out by someone they respect, hoping that right-standing with God will follow.

This is the trap that a discipleship relationship can fall into. So instead of giving steps or A B C’s, I am going to explain the motives. The motives will determine both the action and the outcome.
Following the example set by Jesus; He imparted truth unto His disciples from a heart of love and compassion. He never told His disciples what to do, but instead focused on helping them see who they actually were. The goal of discipleship should, therefore, be to help those less mature than you, to see who they are in Christ Jesus. Help them to find their identity in Him, by laying a foundation of truth in their lives of grace, salvation, righteousness, love and faith.
It is not about forcing your will or your point of view on them, but rather about showing, from the bible, why we believe what we believe, what makes us different and what we are going to do about this difference. There are many discipleship books out there, which go through the biblical reasons for doing what we are doing and saying what we are saying. To use one of these books as a tool would be wise, re-inventing the wheel may not be necessary. Take the good stuff from these tools and ignore the subjective commentaries, keep pointing to the word as the ultimate authority.
Phases
The discipleship relationship can take on many different forms and go through many different phases. The most basic form and phase would be to disciple a person one-on-one into salvation and into a foundation of the word. This form can, however, be done with more than one person being “discipled", depending on the capabilities of the person doing the discipling and the eagerness of those being “discipled".
The group discipleship format can evolve out of a one-on-one set-up. This is more in the model of Jesus, where you minister to a group of like minded individuals, who don’t demand as much attention as they might have in times past. The aim of discipleship is not accountability, encouragement or mentorship. It is to mature people into their full stature in Christ, through helping them to a greater revelation of Him. Accountability, encouragement and mentorship are great spin-offs of a discipleship relationship and some relationships may lay emphasis on this, but they are only additions to a perfect Jesus!

Small group discipleship can still take place within the larger context of church. Because church is not just about Sunday services, it’s about relationships between saints, building each other up in like faith! Thus, in a disciple making church, everyone is a disciple and everyone can be making disciples.
NB: The person “discipling” you doesn’t
take the place of the Holy Spirit opening up scripture and revelation to you. They don’t take the place of Jesus or God. It is important to keep the relationship in perspective, so that no-one is the mediator between you and God, except Jesus. “For there is one God and one Mediator between God and men, the Man Christ Jesus” 1 Timothy 2:5 NKJVThe discipleship relationship is thus a deliberate attempt to imitate Jesus’ example. It isn’t easy, as faithfulness and trust is required, hence the reason the body of Christ is void of it. None the less, it is the solution to our commission!
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